The Fearless Defenders #4 (2013)

Cover:

 

Oh, but I don’t to cut her out and ruin the comic.

 

Plot:

 

The Doom Maidens believe that Valkyrie is one of them, but that can’t be true… can it?

 

Our Heroes:

 

Hippolyta remains awesome as always.

 

Our Villains:

 

You got to admit, Grade-A dirtbags are pretty accurate name to call them.

 

Our Side Characters:

 

I can’t tell who she’s crushing on her.  Is it Tyler, is it Dennis, or is it both?

 

Action:

 

Ow.  The horse should be really given a helmet if it has to smash through a cave ceiling.

 

Dialogue:

 

Oh!  A Moonstar Commemorative Plate!  I would want one.

 

Art:

 

The scene went all black all of a sudden…foreshadowing?

 

Most Memorable Moment:

 

What the hell are they flying?!

 

Final Page:

 

Please be calling She-Hulk… please be calling She-Hulk!

 

What We Should Take from This Comic:

 

Valkyrie, Moonstar, and Hippolyta go to fight the Doom Maidens head on while Misty Lee and Annabelle Riggs decide to call in some extra backup for help.

 

What We Do Take From This Comic:

 

This girls need to do some team building exercises because they do not work well with one another.

 

Yay or Nay?

 

Yay

Avengers #11 (2013)

Cover:

 

Cliché and stereotype anime and Japanese garb that makes no sense in the context of this comic.

 

Plot:

 

Several members of the Avengers are heading to a location where A.I.M. is trying to sell the prototype to one of their bioweapons.  They must find the sellers, the weapon, and all the potential buyers to put an end to this.

 

Our Heroes:

 

… This comic is making Black Widow seem like a sociopath.  I’m pretty sure that’s not a good thing.

 

Our Villains:

 

I still do not get how the hell A.I.M. got their own island to be considered its own nation by the United Nations.  How stupid are people these days?!

 

Our Side Characters:

 

I don’t know why I should care about any of them if they have no personality.

 

Action:

 

Man, these Avengers just straight up murdered some people.  Our heroes are the best!

 

Dialogue:

 

Standard average dialogue.  Nothing more and nothing less.

 

Art:

 

Martial artists can bend their spines like that, right?

 

Most Memorable Moment:

 

*Reviewer bursts into laughter* Oh dear god, A.I.M.?  Are you guys seriously with ridiculous beekeeper helmet and tuxedo combo?

 

Final Page:

 

Avengers… you all suck at your job and as such, you’re all fired except for him.

 

What We Should Take from This Comic:

 

So A.I.M. is trying to sell an army of assassins to different groups, but for some unknown reason.  Again, why?

 

What We Do Take From This Comic:

 

Dammit Black Widow, how the hell did you become an Avengers with that screw the mission and kill them all attitude?  You suck.

 

Yay or Nay?

 

Mmmmmeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhh….

Avengers #10 (2013)

Cover:

 

Generic movie poster cover for the win?

 

Plot:

 

The Avengers are called in to check one of the sites where an origin bomb crashed in Canada and see what had fallen a team that was sent there, Omega Flight.  There, they run into some interesting problems.

 

Our Heroes:

 

They just stumble around and… something is accomplished?

 

Our Villain:

 

Plant life?  I can’t tell.

 

Our Side Characters:

 

I don’t know why I should care about any of them if they have no personality.

 

Action:

 

Bang!  Headshot.

 

Dialogue:

 

Dude, don’t fly away.  If you leave the group, you’ll probably die!  Remember, black dude always dies first.

 

Art:

 

It exists and it is there.  So what?

 

Most Memorable Moment:

Damn it!  Robot dude just got punked by those vines from Troll 3!

 

Final Page:

 

Dun dun dunnn…. Aww who gives a crap.

 

What We Should Take from This Comic:

 

The Avengers checked a zone out and gaining absolutely nothing but confusion.  Nothing learned and nothing lost.

 

What We Do Take From This Comic:

 

Since nothing has been gained or lost, why does this issue exist and what purpose does it hold?

 

Yay or Nay?

 

NAY!!!!

FF #6 (2013)

Cover:

 

Ever get the feeling you are being watched?  Ah, probably nothing.

 

Plot:

 

Medusa and Bentley-23 are missing in action, but meanwhile Darla Deering is having some trouble of her own.  The Yancy Street Gang is starting to harass her for taking Thing’s spot and is determined to make her life hell.

 

Our Heroes:

 

Darla is so good at the guitar, you can litterlly see the notes coming off of it.

 

Our Villains:

 

The truest of evil villains: Overweight, hooded computer hacker dorks!

 

Our Side Characters:

 

… What’s going on with the Moloids?

 

Action:

 

Okay, where is security?

 

Dialogue:

 

So the Inhumans communicate through telepathy and head-butting each other?

 

Art:

 

*Half way through the comic * Hey wait a minute!  This isn’t Mike Allerd’s work!

 

Most Memorable Moment:

 

Justice served.  Ant-Man Style.

 

Final Page:

 

They’ve been teleported into a pink dimension?

 

What We Should Take from This Comic:

 

While Darla’s problem has been resolved for now, Medusa and Bentley are still missing.  Where did they go and what is Medusa’s deal?

 

What We Do Take From This Comic:

 

So there is no such thing as security for concerts in the Marvel Universe?

 

Yay or Nay?

 

yay

The Fearless Defenders #3 (2013)

Cover:

Now that’s an odd tattoo.

Plot:

With the threat of the Doom Maidens returning, Valkyrie must really get going on creating her own team.  Hela, Queen of the Dead, shows up and offers a potential new ally called Hippolyta.  However, will this help or complicate things for everyone?

Our Heroes:

Oh Misty, how we love you.

Our Villain:

Plays with her food?!  DESPICABLE!!

Our Side Characters:

Zip.  Nadda.

Action:

Hippolyta knows how to throw down with the best of them.

Dialogue:

Every time Caroline opens her mouth, I think classic clichéd evil.

Art:

Dead, evil unstoppable villains arise from the dead?  Who needs a surprised  expression on one’s face anyways?

Most Memorable Moment:

Aldvi here has her helmet on backwards.  Also, Arnlief is going for an old school Scarlet Witch look.

Final Page:

“That’s not true!  That’s impossible!”  “Search your feelings, you know it to be true!”

What We Should Take from This Comic:

Valkyrie and buddies are too late and the Doom Maidens have awaken!  However, there is a bigger and more shocking surprise for our heroines than that.

What We Do Take From This Comic:

Every facial expression says to me: Dull Surprise!

Yay or Nay?

Yay

Indestructible Hulk #6 (2013)

Cover:

Oh come on, put some muscle into it!

Plot:

A scientific trip to Jotunheim to get some rare metal ends up going south for Bruce Banner and his science team, especially when he runs into Thor who does not recognize him and a bunch of nasty Frost Giants.

Our Hero:

Indeed, our narrator like you say comic.

Our Villains:

I can’t tell with this art, are these guys made of ice?

Our Side Characters:

Hell, considering your arrest record, I’m surprised you are even allowed near the building.

Action:

Lots of smashing.

Dialogue:

Warmbloods?!  These monsters are racist!

Art:

This comic looks like it was drawn a long time ago.

Most Memorable Moment:

Thor just got thawmed away!

Final Page:

Wait what?

What We Should Take from This Comic:

So apparently while traveling dimensions, Bruce and his team time traveled as well.  Also, Hulk is now worthy of wielding Thor’s hammer.

What We Do Take From This Comic:

When has Hulk been worthy of wielding Thor’s hammer?

Yay or Nay?

Meh

Captain Marvel #11 (2013)

Cover:

Is she running over the roof tops or is she leaps up and down.  Either way, I can’ tell.

Plot:

After a disastrous fight with Deathbird and realizing how dangerous her brain lesion can be, Captain Marvel is grounded and needs to figure out what to do next.

Our Hero:

She’s had better days than this.

Our Villain:

His power is to control birds… from what I gathered.

Our Side Characters:

You think the little girl would not better not to dress up as the villain that messed with Carol.

Action:

Flying motorcycle to the back!

Dialogue:

Carol does not understand your science talk doctor.

Art:

I think Captain Marvel needs to lift some weights.  Her arms look dangerously skinny at points.

Most Memorable Moment:

She can leap tall buildings with a single bound!

Final Page:

So the bird feeders are all in on it?

What We Should Take from This Comic:

Captain Marvel has tracked down the “Newbird” and is ready to get some answers.  Meanwhile, a mysterious man who has the Deathbird working for him watches from below.

What We Do Take From This Comic:

Oh come on Carol, flying motorcycles are awesome

Yay or Nay?

Yay

All New X-Men #9 (2013)

Cover:

Is she pointing at me or you?

Plot:

The original X-Men hit up some training with Kitty Pyrde while Mystique and Sabertooth start to move on their new plan, which involves recruiting a rather interesting character.

Our Heroes:

Teamwork people!  It’s important otherwise everyone’s going to have to do those stupid team building exercises that businesses do.

Our Villain:

Rich is very important I suppose.

Our Side Characters:

Oh Kitty, never change!

Action:

Intense simulation action!

Dialogue:

I think Bobby is starting to crush on Kitty here.

Art:

The colors!  They are so pretty.

Most Memorable Moment:

Cameo by Marvel Zombies.

Final Page:

And now Uncanny X-Men collides with this comic.

What We Should Take from This Comic:

The original five are going to need some more training before they are even ready to be considered a team and possibly stop a mutant genocide.  Also, Cyclops and his merry pals show up at the school, connecting us back to Uncanny X-Men.

What We Do Take From This Comic:

Huh, in Uncanny X-Men, it was daylight out, not with the sun setting.

Yay or Nay?

yay

New Avengers #4 (2013)

Cover:

Man he has small eyes.

Plot:

Intense, exciting talking scenes where the Illuminati decide and plan on what to do.  Or something like that.  I'm not really sure what happened.

Our Heroes:

So could careless about these guys.

Our Villain:

… I am honestly not sure anymore.

Our Side Characters:

I’m suddenly caring more about Dr. Strange’s assistant then him.

Action:

Action?  Just because you see Avengers in the title doesn’t necessary mean action!

Dialogue:

*Insert snoring sound effect here *

Art:

It’s artwork.  Plain and simple.

Most Memorable Moment:

When it ended.

Final Page:

Oh hey, something happened.

What We Should Take from This Comic:

Looks like the New Avengers plans are put aside when Galactus shows on the planet they headed to.

What We Do Take From This Comic:

Best sleep I got in a while.

Yay or Nay?

Nay